my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
