He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
