I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
