So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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