i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize
