glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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