Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize