Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize