i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
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