that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
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