did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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