Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
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