I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Randomize
