So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
