it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
