After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Randomize
