bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
well I can't set my house on fire every night
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
