Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
dude. I can hear the air.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
