38 yer olds are good kisserssss
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I could fuck to npr.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Randomize
