i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Randomize
