Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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