I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize