We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Operation Purity has been aborted
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize
