Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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