"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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