would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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