this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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