6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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