Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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