Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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