There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
