Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Its about making memories worth repressing
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
