Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
There's always time for handjobs
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
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