just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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