I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Randomize
