Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
