Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
