bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
