Is it normal to miss your booty call?
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
It's never too late to be topless.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Randomize
