As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
