Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
