i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Randomize
