You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
