WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
