And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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