you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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