AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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