Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize