8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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