i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
